Scientology Scam

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Recommended: Describe the history of science

So, can you say anything good about Scientologists? Well, they are snazzy dressers. Oh and Tom Cruise is one! And the person who started scientology also wrote that sci-fi classic "Battlefield Earth". What a great movie... :-|

OK let me go on the offensive now...

Scientology is rather young. Beginning in 1953, during a coincidentally timed slump in Layfaette Ronald Hubbard's book sales. Originally a few "help centers" sprung up, taking the places of bookstores where for a nominal fee and the purchase of a copy of Dianetics, you could soon be feeling the effects of a new way to look at religion. Of course the timing is all coincidental right? BZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ Wrong-O-Laserbrain!

Take a look at this quote from a Sci-Fi convention in Newark, New Jersey:
"Writing for a penny a word is ridiculous. If a man really wanted to make a million dollars, the best way to do it would be to start his own religion."Guess who said that? OK that was an easy one... Guess when he said it? March 1949. Oddly enough he hasn't mentioned this directly to any of his cul-- I mean, his congregation.

Scientology bases itself on a belief that we are simply the living vessels for an alien soul. That's right. The alien soul is called the thetan. A human being can get in touch with his inner E.T. by achieving a level of clear (Scientology plays like an RPG, you get XP, you raise levels) It takes a lot of money to become clear, for reasons I have yet to discern, but Juliette Lewis apparently was able to do so, which leads me to believe it was indeed money that spurs the alien to the surface, and not intelligence.

Now, let's take this further.... As many of you know, I'm not a religious man, however I would be remiss to use one of the fundamental pillars of Christianity to lend credence to a new religion I was trying to set up. Yep, that's right, Jesus was a Scientologist. According to L. Ron Hubbard, Jesus was an ordinary man, who went a shade above clear. This allowed his mortal body to produce what looked like miracles, although according to L.R.H. any scientologist can do this with enough training in the way of the thetan. I'm wondering why Scientologists aren't trying to bring more credibility to their religion if this is the case, hell, one or two of them could damn near end world hunger! Oh right, the thetan needs money to perform.

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