Mindsets; Relationships
Are you in a relationship? Dr. Carol Dweck a doctor of Psychology wrote a book about fixed and growth mindsets. In her book she explains both mindsets in different scenerios and the right and wrong ways to act and react. There are several relationships in my life that matter the most to me of which is my relationship with my parents, friends, and best friend.
First, from a child's point of view I believe that parents are their child(’s/ren’s) first love. They are the child's example and model of everything in life, they are the child's first teachers. “If parents want to give their children a gift, the best thing they can do is to teach their children to love challenges, be intrigued by mistakes, enjoy effort, and
…show more content…
All they cared about was that I was owning up to them. They wanted us to have good grades but they were never there to support us when we were learning, but even if they would be I learned right away it's better to sit by yourself and try to understand then to have someone yell over you when you don't understand something. My parents still have a fixed mindset and especially my mom. I find it so funny to the point that it's pathetic she always talks about change but when my brother couldn't hold it in no more and yelled at her and said what she was really doing and that she was the one that needed to change she froze in time and said, “me?”. She was later talking to me and said, “I thought I was a good mom, I always work I always tried to make you happy I always bought you guys stuff”. Material items will never replace the love and care a child needs. There will never be enough phones, computers ,toys, i don't know you name it but there will never be enough of it to replace a love and kindness of a parent that a child needs. At that moment, I realized how she thought of herself. “The all right mother”. I did not respond anything because I knew that if I would I have to …show more content…
If your friend doesn’t challenge you then why are you friends with them? Your friend should not only challenge you but support you, with honesty, through the entire challenge. If your friend doesn't make you a better person then you need to analyze your friendship. This is exactly what happened to me. I had a friend that used me as her stepping stool. She used me to make new friends, get to know people, go out places, and just someone that she could compare herself to to make herself feel better. I realized this but I kept brushing it off. After some time I said enough. We had some conflicts and I explained my side of the situation and that I just needed her to do what she wanted to be responsible for. She kept blaming someone else for everything she did and after that I apologize to her so that I could leave in peace and I did. I don't hate her and at this point I don't have anything against her but I learned my lesson with her and will never again be close friends with her like we were before. “What can I learn from this? What will I do next time I’m in this situation?”(Dweck). When a friendship isn't healthy for you don't get mad but instead analyze what went wrong and why. I saw my mistake and I saw hers and learned from both, what to do as a friend and what not to
It was not until I read Carol S. Dweck’s “Brainology” that I realized I had a fixed mindset. I care more about getting a 4.0 than actually understanding what I am being taught and I also hate struggling. These habits are part of having a fixed mindset. It was after reading this article that I discovered I could change my mindset and be successful. Having a fixed mindset means that you believe that you and others only have a certain amount of intelligence. A growth mindset on the other hand, is believing that everyone has the ability to reach a higher level of intelligence through effort and hardwork.
What does it mean to be a fixed mindset versus a growth mindset? In the book Mindset – The New Psychology of Success author Carol Dweck breaks down the meanings of a fixed mindset versus a growth mindset. A fixed mindset is when a person sees their failures as being an unsuccessful person. These fixed mindsets do not aim to challenge themselves due to the possibility of not succeeding or being seen dumb. They are discouraged by failing and hold back in life. Carol Dweck describes this has unhappiness. A growth mindset is a person who welcomes failures and takes these failures as a challenge to grow from their mistakes. They have the drive to push through the impossible, since to them there is no impossible. A Clear representation of growth
There are many attitudes that form certain mindsets. Some of these mindsets can change how a person does and perceives things. Some mindsets that can do just that are Dweck’s example of a growth mindset and fixed mindsets. According to Dweck, a fixed mindset is one in where “.. students believe that intelligence is fixed..” and a fixed mindset is the “..believe that intelligence is a potential that can be realized through learning. As a result, confronting challenges, profiting from mistakes, and persevering in the face of setbacks become ways of getting smarter. Because people with growth mindsets can through setbacks, and find alternatives to better themselves; They turn to perseverance and hard work to achieve their goals.
I yelled at them, ignored them, and occasionally did the opposite they told me too. At the time, I thought that made me better than them, but in the end, it got me nowhere. Soon I entered high school and my bratty preteen-self calmed down. However, my parents became stricter on my grades because there was a big milestone that would be coming up in a few years, getting accepted into college. My parents made it very clear that if I did not get a large scholarship to any university, I would have to go to the local community college. That was the last thing I wanted to happen, I wanted out of the house. I now had a strong incentive to do well in school. I wanted to be able to go out on my own and escape their tight grasp on me. I completed year after year, always making “A’s” in my classes. I soon climbed to the top of my school’s ranking system and was at the top of my class. Though, this did not matter to me, I wanted out of my house. At this point, I knew I was not disappointing my parents, they were as proud as can be with a daughter at the top of her class. This was the first time in my life that I felt as if my parents were generally proud of me and my accomplishments. I still however, felt guilty. Even though I was doing it for myself, I felt bad that I wanted to escape my parents. I did not hate them, I just could not stand being under their control
Have you ever thought about yourself if you are in the fixed or a growth mindset? A fixed mindset person is someone who overcomes obstacles, works hard, and failure does not stop them. On the other hand a person who is in the fixed mindset is someone who is non challenge, gives up, or thinks that success is abuse. In a book called “Mindset The New Psychology of Success” the author Carol S. Dweck talks about different ways we can convert ourselves from a fixed mindset to a growth mindset and the author also talks about the qualities of the growth and fixed mindsets. In a movie“Freedom Writers” the author Erin Gruwell shows us how she was a growth minded teacher but her students were in the fixed minded group. Throughout the school year the students had a fixed mindset but as time went by the students somehow their mindsets into the growth mindset. Freedom writers illustrates the fixed mindsets of the teacher and students and a growth minded teacher who changed everything.
A parent’s parenting styles are as diverse as the world we live in today. Nowadays, parents only want what is best for their children and their parenting styles plays a crucial role in the development of children which will in the long run, not only effect the child’s childhood years, but later prolong into their adult life as well.
A growth mindset is the belief that you can learn anything you want without a limit. You will not give up and face any challenge in life until you overcome it. A fixed mindset is the belief that you can learn till you reach a certain point. Also, that you will not succeed in life and as soon as you come across a tough challenge you will let it bring you down and won’t ever get back up or face that challenge. Since reading “Brainology” by Carol Dweck, I discovered that I have a growth mindset and fragments of a fixed mindset my whole life.
A parent is worth more than what is stated in “How Much Do Parents Matter?” To a child, a parent is their entire world. A parent is there to support, raise and build up a child. They are there for protection and guidance. When you think of the word ‘Parent’ what comes to mind?
As a maturing adult I now realize the importance of having a strong parental foundation. Throughout my life there have been moments where both parents demonstrated the characteristics of all four basic parenting styles. However, as I aged it became apparent that my parents had successfully found their niche in a parenting style that was analogous with their personality and beliefs. In my father's case it was the authoritative parenting style. With this style he captured my trust and respect; never letting me down. Furthermore, it was my mother's permissive parenting that undeniably contributed towards my love and gratitude for her. There were also instances where my parents influenced my life both positively and negatively. Nevertheless, I am forever grateful for having my parents in my life, for they contributed (and continue to contribute) towards my success as a growing adult.
There are two mindsets growth or fixed. She argues that there is only two mindsets growth or fixed, I agree because these two mindsets are the most common ones in students. This takes me back to Dweck, Carol S. “Brainology”: Transforming Students’ Motivation to Learn. In this article students with growth mindsets cares more about their education rather than how they look. Students with fixed mindsets cared about how smart they will appear and they would reject learning opportunities because they thought intelligence would have to come naturally to them. I agree with what she says, there are only two mindsets. The reason I agree is because I was both mindsets, well now I’m only one. But before I was a fixed mindset and what I mean by that is sometimes I would feel dumb and I wouldn’t even care anymore about my studies. Till I noticed that the way I was going wasn’t going to
middle of paper ... ... Parents must be vigilant and cautious of their actions in front of children. Parents must maintain an active status in the child's social and academic life, to be able to guide the child in the most correct manner as possible. No parent or teacher is perfect, but as a parent or facilitator one must be open minded to negative development at any stage of life of a child.
Individuals view and react differently to situations and challenges in life, the direct effect of having a Fixed mindset or a Growth mindset will coordinate our response . The Fixed mindset is believing our qualities are unchangeable and that the genes we are born with are all that can accomplish, people with the Fixed mindset view a situation or challenge as a negative and as a direct measure of their competence and worth.
Every parent has different skills that they use when dealing with their child. Growing up I had two parents with completely different techniques on how to handle situations with me. Both of my parents love me unconditionally, and would give me the entire world if they could. For every parent, teaching lessons and earning respect is a very important aspect to them. Each of my parents love me so much, but both have very different ways of showing affection, discipline, and communication.
Carol Dweck wrote an essay on the two mindsets students can develop throughout their lifetime. This essay is titled “Brainology” and the two different mindsets are fixed and growth. A fixed mindset is someone who believes that a person should be naturally smart and not have to study or try hard to learn. A growth mindset is the complete opposite. She believes that your mindset is determined by your educational experience (Dweck 2).
Young people’s future and how they are going to act or communicate with other people they are going to meet in life are depend on their parental love. Parental love is really important for kids because it will shape them into who they are in the future. It gives the children the sense of love and how important it is to have someone take care for them. There are kids that do not know who their parents are or they do not get their parental love even though they live together. Some children resent their parents because their parents do not give them enough attention, time and care for them. They decided to spend their time on the street more than at home because they do not get enough attention from their parents. It’s the parental love that shapes kids into who they are, they want to be loved and care for, and who they want to be with.