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Family dynamics and their effects
Effects of parents'separation on their children
Family dynamics and their effects
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Staring out the window of the airplane, part of me hoped that somehow things would all work out. The other part of me knew that recovering from something like this would be very unlikely. This was not the first time I had visited the busy historical city of Newcastle-upon-Tyne, England, but this trip will stay in my heart forever. I learnt that nobody lives forever and we have to appreciate the people we love while we have them. Early October of 2011, at the inexperienced age of 13, I faced the cruel reality that is death. Devastation, confusion, and frustration consumed my thoughts. My whole world had been turned upside down, let me explain. Both my parents immigrated from England before I was born, so seeing my extended family has always been a struggle. We try to visit them once a year, but the expense has unfortunately forced us to settle with every other year. This has often caused me to feel like a stranger, even to my own family. Such was especially the case with my grandfather on my father’s side, Grandpa Alwyn. I hardly knew anything about him, but I always imagined he lived a very full life. His house was always full of odd little bits and bobs, that I assumed he had …show more content…
My father would be traveling to London for a business trip very soon, so taking a little detour north to see his father in the hospital seemed logical. Having recently entered the world of homeschooling, I wanted to tag along. My parents had been somewhat sceptical since I would be required to stay with my grandmother during the week when my father was in London. This was the first I had ever been away from my parents, but I was convinced that I would be alright. Traveling without my mother and younger brother seemed strange, but I knew that they could not be spared from their commitments. Nevertheless I felt excited, even when traveling for such a somber reason; a vacation is a
I wished I could have helped her more, if just to better her last moments on Earth. With all my hours in clinical shadowing or volunteering, with all my coursework as a graduate student in biomedical engineering—I was not preparred for this. I was not ready to cope with the sense of powerlessness I felt that day.
Envision that you're laying in a hospital bed hooked up to numerous machines knowing that your life is ending. Nurses and doctors come in often to check in on you, yet they know nothing they will do can keep you alive. You’re tired and feeling the effects of the many drugs you’ve been put on to control the pain, breathing is hard and you don’t enjoy food like you used to.Doctors have told you there is no chance of survival and you will die very soon. The only thing that matters now is when you will die. You have said goodbye to your family and friends and have come to terms with the harsh reality. If you had the chance to choose how your life would end you could do it now. Yet you can’t. This is because in the place you live, physician assisted
As teenagers, we tend to think that we don't need our parents help, but I must admit that it’s not easy living without either one by your side. For my second year of high school, I moved away from home and became a boarder at Bolles. At first, I was so overly excited to be away from home because I thought I was about to have all the freedom in the world. Well, soon enough I learned that I thought wrong. Of course, being in the dorm environment consisted of certain rules to ensure our safety and of course there were rules that the borders, including myself did and do not agree on. Over the past three years, I have observed that the boarder population feels like some rules are not made for our safety, but made to stop us from having a little
The most unfortunate fact about death is sometimes arrives unexpected and the quick action seizes years of work, plans, irreplaceable feelings and definetly damages the surroundings. Death collects away the energy from our closest friends and loved ones, while our few companions have to make adjustments moving and sustaining into the future discovering divergent paths to lay a hold of and experience while leaving the old ways behind. People are abandoned to bare the vicarious feelings from such a tragic event and become survivors, often abscond into different lifestyles or professions. “ Who will
Seventeen years ago, I came bounding into a world of love and laughter. I was the first child, the first grandchild, the first niece, and the primary focus of my entire extended family. Although they were not married, my parents were young and energetic and had every good intention for their new baby girl. I grew up with opportunities for intellectual and spiritual growth, secure in the knowledge that I was loved, free from fear, and confident that my world was close to perfect. And I was the center of a world that had meaning only in terms of its effect on me-- what I could see from a height of three feet and what I could comprehend with the intellect and emotions of a child. This state of innocence persisted through my early teens, but changed dramatically in the spring of my sophomore year of high school. My beloved father was dying of AIDS.
Have you ever almost been killed or in a near death experience? Well I have, and I can personally tell you that it is not something that you ever want to do in your lifetime. It all happened about 5 years ago when I was in 3rd or 4th grade. I was 8 years old and, now that I really think about it, because I’m writing this paper, that was probably one of the worst, if not worst, days in my entire life. No, it probably was the worst day in my life.
Two years and four months ago I died. A terrible condition struck me, and I was unable to do anything about it. In a matter of less than a year, it crushed down all of my hopes and dreams. This condition was the death of my mother. Even today, when I talk about it, I burst into tears because I feel as though it was yesterday. I desperately tried to forget, and that meant living in denial about what had happened. I never wanted to speak about it whenever anyone would ask me how I felt. To lose my Mom meant losing my life. I felt I died with her. Many times I wished I had given up, but I knew it would break the promise we made years before she passed away. Therefore, I came back from the dead determined and more spirited than before.
I slowly pulled out my phone to see it was my Father calling “It happened” “please come home”. That was all that was said, and in no time at all I was standing over his body. He looked so peaceful, like it all was a bad dream and, He was just gone. Just like that, one of my greatest friends, and teachers was gone without another word. I had no closure, and had no idea if he was at peace. The hardest lesson I ever learned, and it has changed how I look at everything. Life is short, but the souls you touch and the memories and lessons passed down from you too the rest of the family. That, that makes you immortal. I wake up every day so grateful for the life that I lead and I know that it was all made possible by a man who wasn’t even related to me by any blood. He had no obligation to me, yet the only reason I am in college is because of him always taking care of this family. He’s taking care of us right now even in death with the money left to us through all these programs that none of us even knew He signed up for. He’s life and, his death has molded me from high school too now slowly learning all the lesson he silently
When 12 years old came around, nothing could’ve primed me for the amount of devastation that was to submerge my happy little world. Two months after my birthday, I received word that my renowned and dearly loved, Uncle Dean, had been killed in an unfortunate automobile accident. Crushed, yet filled with a strange numbness, I became withdrawn and dwindled in disbelief. “How could this be?” I would repeat those words of this question over and over to myself, as if it were some magical mantra that could resurrect my deceased best ally. I began taking in the gravity of what this all meant: no more “piggy-back” rides, no more wrestling matches, no more late-night video game contests, ultimately no more fun with Uncle Dean, ever. I never got a opportunity to say good-bye.
When faced with new environmental changes and a lifestyle to adapt to, many college students feel overwhelmed by homesickness. Homesickness is most commonly due to anxiety, depression, and loneliness. A research studied concluded that homesick college students are three times more likely to drop out than non-homesick students. For many first-year college students, being away from home can be like an adventure. It’s exhilarating to be off on your own and completely in charge of your life and social well-being. I know that during my first week in college, I didn’t feel homesick at all because I was so anxious to meet new people, explore campus, and check out my classes. However, as I got more used to
Not more than twenty minutes into my drive, I found myself suddenly overcome by reality, and grief became my driving companion. There was a song on the radio that stirred all my emotions into nervous gumbo. I felt everything from anger to happiness, from betrayal to fortunate. As I continued, I started to see my life unfold in front of me in a thousand different ways. This was a pivotal point in my life, and what I did now would affect the rest of my life. Could I even have a life after this? The questions I asked my God and myself that day are too many to count. This was pure emotional trauma, and at the age of twenty-one, I was not ready to handle this life on my own.
On Tuesday, March 19, 1985, a horrific accident occurred as a fire broke out on Second and “J” Street in San Bernardino. Overnight, it instantly killed my mother, stepfather, brother, and two sisters. Because I tragically lost my entire family, it transitioned and transformed me into the person that I am today. I had spent many nights at my Aunt Joanna’s house, my mom’s sister because my stepfather, Andy, use to beat me immensely. He beat me to the point where he put me in a coma twice. Even though I survived the beatings and death, I still spent the rest of my childhood and adolescent years in a
I don’t know a lot about my grandfather, I know he drank and smoked heavily for a long time, and that those were the main contributors to his death at the age of 45. My grandmother told me that he was a very loving man, but that there was always a deep sadness that followed him since she had known him. My grandmother Jaqueline was probably one of the two strongest people I have ever known, she had survived German occupation in Normandy (and fought against it as a teenager), lived in some of the poorest countries in the world teaching rural school children, and raised 5 children after having been left a widow. While not all of my uncles would turn out well following the death of their father, she tried her hardest as a single parent to make sure they always had food and a loving family to come home to, but she faced many of the same economic and social problems that single parents still face today (Knox, 362). She also had very polarized views of types of people and wasn’t afraid to talk about it (she was racist towards Romani) and it often upset my family, as my aunt and cousins are Romani (My parents were able to turn that into a lesson about racism and how it hurts people). Her long stays with my family would often put a lot of strain on my parent’s relationship, but living in France, it was not a trip she or my family could make often. Much like Harriet’s mother in The Fifth Child, she did come stay with us for several months when I was extremely ill, in order to let my parents keep working, but this still had a toll on all of them. These interviews with my parents not only gave me an insight into the differences between them and myself, but also allowed me to remember and see the connections to the wonderful but flawed people that they came
On the fourteenth day of October 2008 year of my life, I was a frustrated fellow. I woke up to heart breaking news about losing my best confidant friend, and at a tender age of fifteen. At first, it was not a realizable incident; there was no way I was going to accept that degree of collateral damage of losing the only thing that I knew for the past decade of my life. It later dawned on me that it was an event that I had zero controls over and as such, there was no way that I was going to reverse the condition. Denial of her saddened set in that moment and it pained me that I hadn’t been there for her as a friend when she needed me most, or at least realized that there was something amiss in her of late.
Most can understand the traumatizing effect an accident can bring upon them, but not all. During the summer of 2009, I experienced what could happen during a wreck. It was another hot and dry day in Kansas, my sister and I had decided to take the back roads because the back tire was low. We were just having some fun, when suddenly everything went black. When I finally awoke wheat was flying everywhere and the car was still moving. Realizing that something was wrong, I yelled at the top of my lungs. Ashley woke up and tried to turn the car, but we ended up in a ditch. Leaving the car, I looked back at the damage and stared in awe as it struck me how lucky we were to still be alive. This memory is significant to me because it shifted how I will