You may have wondered what is anger? It isn't just an emotion or a state of mind. It is deeper than this. Take a second and follow along as I give you a picture of anger.
Anger is red. It is the stream of blood pumping through your veins. Anger is hot. It is the buildup of all your emotions into a single meltdown. Anger is ramming your fist into a wall and watching the skin peel back from your knuckles without a second thought. It is the pile of curse words that spill out from your lips in a quick rage.
Anger is regret. It is not doing what your were supposed to do. It is knowing there was something you could do to help and not doing it. Anger is failing. It is not being able to stop the inevitable. It is coming off of the football field
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It is getting into an argument and making the other person's ears bleed. It is making someone so frustrated that they are on the verge of tears. It is taking all of your negative energy and pushing it onto someone else. A Lot of people say this is unhealthy, they recommend seeing a therapist. Okay yea sure a therapist may help, but I can't afford that, plus I won't feel comfortable talking to a complete stranger. They may not even be able to relate to me. Then what do I do? Get angry all over again.
Anger is hate. Anger is when you see someone and want to buss their head open to the white meat. It is seeing the person you hate the most and your body tenses up. It is the voice in the back of your head saying all these nasty things. Anger is wishing deadly things will happen to someone. It is laughing when you hear misfortune come to someone you despise. You probably want to say, hate is a very strong word, you shouldn't use that. If I came into your home and destroyed what mattered most to you, how would you feel about me?
Anger is silent. It is clenching your teeth when you want to say hurtful words. It is balling up your fist when you want to fight. It is turning the other cheek and taking deep breaths when you are did wrong. It is looking someone dead in their eyes knowing you can mess up their life.. But you
The Dance of Anger: A Woman’s Guide to Changing the Patterns of Intimate Relationships by Harriet Lerner, Ph.D. takes a deeper look into anger and how it influences our lives in different personal relationships such as with significant others, parents, children, friends, and co-workers. Anger is not an expression that women have been able to express as freely as men. However, it is an emotion that everyone has. Sugar and spice and everything nice is what girls are said to be made of. Lerner explains that there are two ways that society categorizes women in how they deal with anger. She said that there are two categories; a woman is usually either the “nice-lady” or the “bitchy” women. The “nice-lady” is the woman that stays quiet and keeps her feelings to herself in hopes of avoiding conflict. These women will often avoid telling people how they feel, because they do not want to step on anyone’s toes. However, this behavior is hurting them in the long run because they are using all of their energy toward protecting the other person and the relationship that they lose their clarity of self (Lerner, pp. 5-6). The “bitchy” woman on the other hand does not shy away from expressing her anger. She often forms a pattern of fighting, complaining, and blaming to get her point across. This way of communicating can diminish the integrity of the point they are trying to express, because when they voice their anger without clarity or control they give other people the upper hand (Lerner, pp. 8-10). The book tries to move away from these certain styles and focuses more on trying to show better ways of getting a point across. In the book, Lerner explains where anger comes from, why relationships fall into repetit...
One of the most significant examples of violence caused by anger is due to the emotion jealousy. For instance, jealousy played as an accomplice to violence in The Odyssey. One example is when the suitors in Ithaca were planning to kill Telemachus, so that one of them could become king of Ithaca and marry
“Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one who gets burned.” -Siddartha Guatama. An act of anger is only spent on yourself. These two poems are one in the same, where “A poison Tree” tells the affect of holding onto anger, “The Most Vital Thing in Life” gives an idea as to how to fix it. There are a lot of fruitlessly upset people in this world, and the realization that you only hurt yourself should be enough to take these poets advice. While they come from two different backgrounds, with two different ways of dealing with the anger they carry, the message is the same, letting the anger manifest itself through you will only poison your mind, and your happiness, which is truely the most vital thing in life.
Seneca defined anger as "a burning desire to avenge a wrong" or "a burning desire to punish him by whom you think yourself to have been unfairly harmed" (Seneca On Anger Extracts I.2). When we feel we have been unjustly treated, an agitated feeling arises which is called “anger” (Cooper, J& Procope, J 1995 p.6). Seneca then talked about the accordance of anger with nature. He said "Man was created for mutual assistance, anger for mutual destruction..."and "anger is greedy for punishment…" (Seneca On Anger Extracts I.5). This suggest that anger opposite the common
If anger were a disease, there would be an epidemic in this country. Road Rage, spousal and child abuse, and a lack of civility are just a few examples. Emotionally mature people know how to control their thoughts and behaviors how to resolve conflict. Conflict is an inevitable art of school and work, but it can be resolved in a positive way.
Zits is always angry because he feels betrayed by his family and blames them for all the pain they have caused. Once he meets Justice, he learns how to feel powerful and take revenge. Justice gives Zits two fake guns to practice shooting at random strangers without any hesitation. Gradually, Zits is able to shoot people without regret because his anger blinds him from seeing the damage he is causing. Anger prohibits us from realizing that someone has more than one characteristic than our first impressions of them. There is only instantaneous jolt of power. That feeling tells you that someone has wronged you and you have the authority to do whatever you want until there is reconciliation. Anger is a result of fear and lack of self confidence when dealing with betrayal. However, that anger doesn’t signify strength, only
Anger is a signal …. It may be a message that we are being hurt, that our rights are being violated; that our needs or wants are not being adequately met or simply that something is not right ( 1).
...e person feel better at a certain point. The amount of anger a person feels at this stage is inexorable. Doctors, nurses, closed ones and every other person; are victimized by the person’s anger whether or not they are at fault. Even the law of nature is faulty of completing its course. Kubler-Ross and Kessler defined anger as being an anchor and “giving temporary structure to the nothingness of loss.” Anger is meaningful in the light of darkness. Anger encompasses feelings such as love, regret, guilt and hope.
and pleasure, the body changes into a relaxed state. When an individual is angry different
Whether that be because a coworker has been a complete crap to you all day, or your kid didn’t listen to you and ended up getting hurt for the thousandth time in a row, to getting ultimately stressed and frustrated because your teachers didn’t enter in grades and denies any proof of that occurring, we’ve all been there. When I’ve seen others get angry, they become confrontational or even start yelling, some people that I know of even throw things either at the people that they are angry at, or at other areas, such as walls. There are four different types of angry people: the avoiders, who avoid the situation completely and ignore their anger, bottling it up; the destroyers, who throw things out of anger in order to relieve it; the screamers, who scream, yell or even just become straightforward and rude either towards the person that they are angry towards; the avengers, who come up with plans to get back at the person who angered them, though most times those people don’t actually go through with their villainy plots. The ‘trigger’s, or the things that set people off to become angry, vary from person to person. In my experience, most triggers come from when someone does something that truly peeves them, which could be anything from loud noises to the mood that the other person has towards
Emotion and cognition are intricately intertwined and hard to tell which is influencing us in our everyday lives. While the former are sometimes referred to as feelings and affects (this term would be used interchangeably with emotion in this article) or “hot cognition”, the latter is often thought as our reasoning, or “cold cognition” (Zajonc, 1980). However, it is quite evident from our day-to-day account of events that it’s always the emotional parts of life that catch our attention - especially the bad ones. For one thing, as a general phenomenon, bad news is considered more newsworthy and can easily attract more reader attention (Baumeister,
The research on trait anger yields many different definitions. One of the most common definitions found referred to trait anger as the predisposition to observe several situations as frustrating and experience frequent states of anger. Anger in terms of the emotion itself was defined as “a basic emotion experienced by almost all human beings in response to the unwanted and unexpected behavior of others” (Tafrate, Kassinove, Dundin, 2002, p. 1573). There is a clear consensus that the emotion anger is experienced frequently my most. The difference in trait anger is that it is imbedded in one’s personality and tends to affect the way one views and reacts to the world. It especially affects those high in trait anger. Individuals with high trait anger may feel enraged often and can be sensitive to being treated unfairly. Trait anger can consist of interrelated elements of cynical beliefs and attributions, angry emotional states and aggressive or antagonistic behaviors.
Anger is an immediate reaction to an obstacle. It is a strong negative emotion of displeasure, hostility or fury that might occur to anyone on any occasion. Anger generates other bad feelings such as fear, disgust, shame, irritability, outrage, hostility and even violence and the aggressive response it generates can harm you. Anger is a punishment to you for somebody's fault.
When we act out of anger, causing another person pain... what happens? Well, most of the time that person not only lashes out in response, but they also pass it on to the next person causing this never-ending domino effect. That is where we have to break the cycle. We need to learn how to act out of love and compassion even though we are suffering and even bigger - we need to recognize when others are suffering by responding to their anger with love. By saying "Hey, what 's wrong? What can I do to help?" or even just a simple "Hey... I understand."
This can either be a positive or negative thing and how you act on it, or do not act, can show how in control and effective you are with your feelings. According to the text, “just because you feel a certain way does not mean you have to act on it” and that “people who act out angry feelings actually feel worse than those who experience anger without lashing out” (Adler, Rosenfeld, Proctor II, year?). Even though acting on your feelings may seem uncontrollable, it is important to deal with them in a different and more productive way. Recognizing how you feel and using the right approach during a constructive conversation is always better than quickly lashing out without completely understanding the situation or how you feel besides angry. Furthermore, “recognizing the difference between feeling and acting can liberate you from the fear that getting in touch with certain emotions will commit you to a course of action” (Adler, Rosenfeld, Proctor II, year?). Understanding your emotions is important so that you will be able to experience feelings that may upset you and still be able to deal with them from a positive standpoint. Once you can separate your feelings from actions you will be able to make more rational