Unsuccessful intercultural encounters can sometimes result in tremendous consequences like losing business deals, breaking relationships or even destroying blood ties. In fact, for those who have watched the documentary “Daughter from Danang”, the idea of the last consequence would emerge vividly and hauntingly. The documentary, directed by Gail Dolgin and Vicente Franco, tells the reunion between a daughter and her long-lost birth mother. The reunion, which is expected to be an exhilarating experience, unfortunately becomes a painful one with heartbreaking moments. The failure of this reunion can be attributed to a number of reasons, but the most visible one is perhaps the issue of cultural differences. through the lens of intercultural communication, …show more content…
After the fall of the Saigon in 1975, Heidi’s mother- Mrs. Mai Thi Kim decided to send her to America as fearing for her uncertain future in Vietnam. Twenty two years later years, Heidi eventually found her Vietnamese mother. However, as she was raised in the States, Heidi is now "101%" American and has little knowledge of her Vietnamese heritage. Undoubtedly, this reality reveals potentials for cultural collision. The first notable problem arises from differences in the use space and touch. In terms of proxemics, which is the study of how people use personal space differently (Hall,1966), each culture has its preferred concept and use of personal space. When it comes to touch, cultures can vary in the amount of touching and the meanings of …show more content…
Kim’s following her around all day and the excessive touching she receives, both of which make Heidi feels rather “smothered”. This feeling can be explained by the high need for personal space of Northern Americans, who usually expect others to keep their distance (Sammons, n.d.). As Heidi grew up in the U.S, she is under the influence of this spatial pattern; hence, she perceives what could be seen as a loving, caring behavior of her Vietnamese mother as a violation of personal space. In contrast, Vietnamese have lower preference for interpersonal distance compared to Americans, and in the case of Mrs. Kim, her wish to spend time with her daughter also inclines her to follow Heidi. In addition, Heidi and her mother have dissimilar interpretation of touch. While Heidi views the constant need of touching make her mother look like a child, and as if she was the parent, Mrs. Kim considers it as a way to show her affection and love towards Heidi. Though these differences do not lead to a confrontation between Heidi and her mother, they certainly have adverse effect on the newly bonded relationship. The next communication gap concerns with the individualism- collectivism dimension, which is the degree an individual is integrated into groups in a society (Hofstede, 2001). Individualistic cultures like the U.S put a strong emphasis on individual autonomy and independence, whereas collectivist cultures like Vietnam believe in belonging, obligation
Asuncion-Landé, N. C., & Pascasio, E. M. (1981). Building bridges across cultures: Perspectives on intercultural communication--theory and practice. Manila, Philippines: Solidaridad Pub. House.
Cultural differences in the United States have always impacted personal relationships, sometimes for the good, but also for the bad. Lenny and Eunice’s cultural variances were no different. Lenny Abramov was a 39-year-old man who worked in Indefinite Life Extension at Post-Human Services, which allowed the wealthy and the healthy—known as High Net Worth Individuals—to become immoral. Lenny is a self-deprecating Russian-American Jewish male, who is self-conscious about his appearance, uselessly well educated, passionate, neither old nor young, and helplessly prone to error. Eunice Park, on the other hand, is a 24-year-old young Korean-American woman who is constantly struggling with materialism and the pressures of her ...
This article provides me a detailed research on a group of American and Chinese adults with plenty of data and analysis. They provided a lot of real and objective opinion on the comparison between individualism and collectivism. The fact of the whole respondents are students gives me an advantage on finding better ways to understand and use this research in my
Ting-Toomey, Stella., & Chung, Leeva C. (2012). Understanding Intercultural Communication. Oxford University Press. 43, 159-160.
As the four women entered America, which is far from their motherland China, they experience a change of culture, the American culture, which was dominant than the Chinese. The Chinese mothers are faced with a difficult task of how to raise their American-born daughters with an understanding of their heritage. The daughters clearly show a gap in culture between the Chinese culture and American culture. The mothers wanted their daughter to follow the Chinese traditions, but the daughters followed the American traditions and even some of them got married to American men. The mothers tried to tell their daughters the story about the Chinese ancestors but the daughter could not follow them and the daughters thought their mothers were backwards and did not know what they are saying. As much as the mothers tried to show love to their daughters, the daughters usually responded negatively. They often saw their mothers’ attempts to guidance as a failure to understand the American culture. Being Chinese and living in America, both the mothers and the daughters struggle with many issues like identity, language, translation, and others. The mothers try to reconcile their Chinese pasts with their American presents; the daughters try to find a balance between independence and loyalty to their heritage
The main coping mechanism, then, became suppressing of the memories and emotions attached to the traumas of the Vietnam Wars. Their home served as the host of these demons, but the demons impacted parenting styles. Thi acknowledges that her parents taught her and her siblings many lessons, some intentional but others, quite the contrary. It was the “unintentional ones [that] came from their unexorcised demons and from the habits they formed over so many years of trying to survive;”(“The Best We Could Do,” 295) these lessons were indeed unintentional because just like the suppressed communication, they derived weak communication between the parents and the children. In Min Zhou’s article “Are Asians Becoming ‘White’?” she concludes by including a picture of a Vietnamese family celebrating the 1998 Lunar Year, looking happy. This happy family in the article is much like the Bui family because on the outside, they appeared happy, but inside their home and their hearts, a darkness
With the globalization and modernization, there is a social tendency to melt different individuals into an integral and international community. In America, individuals from different culture struggle with assimilation to the white mainstream. They find it painful but worth to mute racial identity for future success. Assimilation to an advanced culture is a somewhat progress and broaden the space for self-growth. But sometimes individuals feels pressure to force them blend in the surroundings. On the contrary, some individuals use the advantages of racial differences to exceed others in the mainstream. Amy Chua, in her essay “Why Chinese Mothers are Superior”, takes advantage of the fact that American parents underrate rote repetition and insists
The United States and its people take great pride in knowing that the U.S. is the greatest nation in the world. That is why it’s our duty to father the rest of the world when conflicts arise. American culture and ideals are also thought to take precedents over all other cultures and ideals. In the book, The Spirit Catches You and You Fall down, written by Anne Fadiman, there are many great examples of how American culture is imposed on the people residing with in its enclosed boundaries. The U.S. going to war in Vietnam is also a great example of how the U.S. tried to impose American values on the “less fortunate.” Through understanding America’s so called “duty” in Vietnam one can interpret the intervention of American idealism in the life of a Hmong family.
Just like the durian, my Vietnamese culture repulsed me as a young child. I always felt that there was something shameful in being Vietnamese. Consequently, I did not allow myself to accept the beauty of my culture. I instead looked up to Americans. I wanted to be American. My feelings, however, changed when I entered high school. There, I met Vietnamese students who had extraordinary pride in their heritage. Observing them at a distance, I re-evaluated my opinions. I opened my life to Vietnamese culture and happily discovered myself embracing it. `
Martin, J. N., & Nakayama, T. K. (2013). Intercultural Communication in Contexts (6th ed.). New York: McGraw-Hill.
Phillips, Delores B. "Quieting Noisy Bellies: Moving, Eating and Being in the Vietnamese Diaspora." University of Minnesota Press 73 (2009): 47-87. Print
Amy Tan’s “Fish Cheeks” describes Tan’s upbringing as a Chinese-American caught in between two cultures. In “Fish Cheeks” Tan’s crush Robert and his family were invited to Tan’s house for Christmas, Amy was embarrassed of Robert’s impression of her Chinese relatives, cuisine, and culture (Tan 110). Tan’s situation is not uncommon as millions of first generation Americans encounter similar situations while living within two cultures. Albeit the extreme embarrassment Tan endured throughout the encounter, she contends that her mother taught her a valuable lesson in appreciating her Chinese culture (111). Ultimately, Tan's purpose was to implore first generation Americans to embrace both of their cultures, in spite of its unique traditions (Tan
Four Chinese mothers have migrated to America. Each hope for their daughter’s success and pray that they will not experience the hardships faced in China. One mother, Suyuan, imparts her knowledge on her daughter through stories. The American culture influences her daughter, Jing Mei, to such a degree that it is hard for Jing Mei to understand her mother's culture and life lessons. Yet it is not until Jing Mei realizes that the key to understanding who her mother was and who she is lies in understanding her mother's life.
“Individualistic cultures, in the western-hemisphere, [such as the United States,] emphasize… personal identity and self-determination. Conformity is far less pervasive in individualistic societies because democratic choices and laissez-faire viewpoints are somewhat considered.”
Before I was five, I thought I was Chinese. However, I wondered why I couldn’t understand the Chinese patrons of Chinatown restaurants. Upon learning my true ethnicity, I pulled out a mammoth atlas we had under the bed. My father pointed to an “S”-shaped country bordering the ocean, below China. It was then that I learned my parents were refugees from Vietnam. “Boat people,” my mother, still struggling to grasp English back then, would hear kids whispering when she walked through the halls of her high school. Like many refugees, although my parents and their families weren’t wealthy when they came to America, they were willing to work hard, and like many Vietnamese parents, mine would tell me, “We want you to be success.”