An Analysis of the Mother in Tillie Olsen's Story, "I Stand Here Ironing"

1149 Words3 Pages
bulb-icon

Recommended: Essay on the impact of childhood neglect

The mother in Tillie Olsen’s story, “I Stand Here Ironing” gives insight into the upbringing of her first child. We see she is guilty of neglect towards Emily and is distressed due to poor decisions that she had made rearing her daughter. The mother reflects on the past and thinks that her actions and “lack of” might have affected Emily. She is so engulfed in “what ifs” and “how could I’s” that she is practically beating herself mentally. Poor Emily received little attention when attention was needed, allowing us to condemn the mother for her actions. At the same time we understand her because in the past 19 years there were certain situations that they endured where she had no control, leaving her helpless.

What we see in the mother from the beginning is guilt, guilt about neglecting Emily. After a concerned phone call about her daughter, anger caused by guilt buried within herself emerges “who needs help…you think because i am her mother I have a key...there is all that life that has happened outside of me, beyond me.” The mother is defensive and outraged about this phone call at first but shortly after we see the guilt. We find ourselves asking why does she act this way and how is guilt associated with the way she acted? In Leslie S. Greenberg Ph.D, David Engel Ph.D, Roger J. Daldrup Ph.D, and Larry E. Beutler Ph.D book, “Focused Expressive Psychotherapy: Freeing the Overcontrolled Patient”, they explain what focused expressive psychotherapy (FEP) is, how to identify symptoms in need of FEP treatment and how to treat using FEP. On page 9 of their book, they explain different types of anger expressed by people and what types classify for treatment. “Defensive anger is a specific form of deflection in which people appear to e...

... middle of paper ...

...ck of cards that prevented her from becoming her full potential. When the mother speaks of Emily this way she is simply saying that Emily will find her way through life somehow, someway. She might not become anyone important, she might not do incredible things, and she might not even live the life she wanted. In the end, Emily will still live a life that is worth living with all the mistakes, regrets, and decisions that will all be her own.

Works Cited

Tillie Olsen’s story, “I Stand Here Ironing” ,Leslie S. Greenberg Ph.D, David Engel Ph.D, Roger J. Daldrup Ph.D, and Larry E. Beutler Ph.D book, “Focused Expressive Psychotherapy: Freeing the Overcontrolled Patient”,American humane association website, http://www.americanhumane.org/children/stop-child-abuse/fact-sheets/child-neglect.html, Linda Wasmer Andrews book “The Encyclopedia of Depression Volume 1, page 271

Show More
Related

  • Free College Essays - Fear in William Faulkner's A Rose for Emily

    909 Words  | 2 Pages

    Life is sad and tragic; some of which is made for us and some of which we make ourselves. Emily had a hard life. Everything that she loved left her. Her father probably impressed upon her that every man she met was no good for her. The townspeople even state “when her father died, it got about that the house was all that was left to her; and in a way, people were glad…being left alone…She had become humanized” (219). This sounds as if her father’s death was sort of liberation for Emily. In a way it was, she could begin to date and court men of her choice and liking. Her father couldn’t chase them off any more. But then again, did she have the know-how to do this, after all those years of her father’s past actions? It also sounds as if the townspeople thought Emily was above the law because of her high-class stature. Now since the passing of her father she may be like them, a middle class working person. Unfortunately, for Emily she became home bound.

    Read More

  • The Neurosequential Model of Therapeutics: An Intervention for Early Childhood Neglect

    1288 Words  | 3 Pages

    McCoy, M. L., & Keen, S. M., (2009). Child abuse and neglect. New York: Psychology Press.

    Read More

  • The Symbol of the Rose in William Faulkner's A Rose for Emily

    665 Words  | 2 Pages

    The domineering attitude of Emily's father keeps her to himself, inside the house, and alone until his death. In his own way, Emily's father shows her how to love. Through a forced obligation to love only him, as he drives off young male callers, he teaches his daughter lessons of love. It is this dysfunctional love that resurfaces later, because it is the only way Emily knows how to love.

    Read More

  • I Stand Here Ironing: The 1950s Woman

    889 Words  | 2 Pages

    Tillie Olsen makes the narrator contradict the ideal housewife of the 1950s image for a reason. By doing this, she shows that even if you are a less than perfect mother and or housewife, it is not always your fault if things go wrong. For instance, if the narrator in this story exemplified the image of a 50s housewife, we, the readers, would not even consider blaming her for Emily's condition as well as for her relationship with Emily. However, the narrator does not exemplify the ideal image of a housewife. Thus, we, as the audience, are compelled to blame her imperfections. However, as the story goes on, it is realized that the narrator did the best that she could for Emily. She was a first time mother with no safety net. Her situation as a single mother and sole provider during Emily's early years left her with no choice. She did what she had to do.

    Read More

  • Burn Scars: Dichotomy of Sisterhood in Everyday Use

    1241 Words  | 3 Pages

    She states that she was the only child, out of the five she has total, that was beautiful from the very moment she was born. Emily was smart, “She blew bubbles of sound. She loved motion, loved light, loved color and music and textures. She would lie on the floor in the blue overalls patting the surface so hard in ecstasy her hands and feet would blur.”(Olsen 291). When Emily was eight months old, she needed to stay with a woman downstairs while the narrator looked for a job. Eventually, the narrator had to send Emily to live with her father and his family until she has raised enough money for her fare back. Emily’s father had left because he was scared of becoming poor so her mother was not to happy with this decision. When the narrator finally raised the money for Emily to come home, she had gotten the chicken pox and had to stay home. Once she was healed, she returned immediately. The narrator barely recognizes Emily when comes home. She says she is thin and looks like her father and was now two years old. This means she is old enough to go into nursery school; in order for the narrator to keep her job, she needed to take Emily there. Emily did not like it though, the narrator says “She always had a reason why we should stay home. Momma, you look sick. Momma, I feel sick. Momma, the teachers aren’t there today, they’re sick”.(Olsen

    Read More

  • Ethos Pathos In Miss Emily

    1197 Words  | 3 Pages

    We had long thought of them as a tableau, Miss Emily a slender figure in white in the background, her father a spraddled silhouette in the foreground, his back to her and clutching a horsewhip, the two of them framed by the back-flung front door. So when she got to be thirty and was still single, we were not pleased exactly, but vindicated; even with insanity in the family she wouldn 't have turned down all of her chances if they had really materialized.’ (25) This complete sheltering leaves Emily to play into with in her own deprived reality within her own mind, creating a skewed perception of reality and relationships”(A Plastic Rose,

    Read More

  • Compare And Contrast I Stand Here Ironing And Everyday Use

    1087 Words  | 3 Pages

    Emily’s mother is just a teenager when she had Emily. She did not have the money or resources to take care of her, so she had to let Emily live with her grandparents for a couple of years before she could get Emily back. When Emily was two, her mother finally got her custody of her, but Emily is not the little girl she remembered. When the mother first had Emily, she described her as a beautiful baby (302), but it changed when Emily became sickly and got scars from chicken pox. The mother said, “When she finally came, I hardly knew her, walking quick and nervous like her father, looking like her father, thin, and dressed in a shoddy red that yellowed her skin and glared at the pockmarks. All the baby loveliness gone. (302)” Nevertheless, the mother is never there for Emily as she grew up. Emily tried to show her mother in different ways that she needed her, but she never seemed to catch the hint. For example, when Emily was two her mother sent her to a nursery school. The teacher of the nursery school was mistreating the children, and instead of telling her mother directly like the other kids told their parents, she told her in different ways. She always had a reason why we should stay home. Momma, you look sick. Momma, I feel sick. Momma, the teachers aren’t there today, they’re sick. Momma, we can’t go, there was a fire there last night. Momma, it’s a holiday

    Read More

  • The Story of an Hour by Kate Chopin and A Rose for Emily by William Faulkner

    1106 Words  | 3 Pages

    life and looked for a way to gain her freedom. Emily must endure her fathers

    Read More

  • A Mother's Helplessness in "I Stand Here Ironing"

    415 Words  | 1 Pages

    Because the mother is living in a world of depression a dark wall has wrapped itself around her. Worrying solemnly about the life of her daughter, the mother is neglecting to appreciate the positive attributes her daughter is presenting. Emily is a gifted comedian, "Where does it come from, that comedy?" (p.159) being a comedian during the Great Depression is almost as rare as finding water during an extensive drought. If the mother wasn't as depressed she would be able to appreciate the comedy that Emily is passionate for. The mother's character is left in a state of helplessness reaching out beyond depression to view the comedian inside her daughter.

    Read More

  • Mother-Daughter Relationships in Literature

    1055 Words  | 3 Pages

    The narrator reflects and regrets on her daughter Emily’s past. The narrator feels guilty about leaving Emily at a neighbor’s house, sending her to nursery school and a convalescent facility. In her short story “I Stand Here Ironing”, Olsen describes the convalescent home as she insert “The parents stand below shrieking up to be heard and the children shriek down to be heard, and between them the invisible wall “Not To Be Contaminated by Parental Germs or Physical Affection” (226). When Emily is in the convalescent facility, she is cut off from outside world, including the communication with her mother. Besides the convalescent facility, the iron itself also has a symbolic meaning. In the beginning of the short story, Olsen writes “I stand here ironing, and what you asked me moves tormented back and forth with the iron” (223). The narrator is ironing during a phone conversation with an adult concerned about Emily 's well-being. Toward the end, the author express the Emily’s feeling when she says “Aren’t you ever going to finish the ironing, Mother” (229). The non-stop ironing annoys Emily because her own mother is willing to spend the time on ironing despite it would extend the distance between the two of them. The simple act of ironing not only symbolizes the duty as a mother but also represent the helplessness to change the circumstances. The absences of the narrator and the lack of communication weakens the bond

    Read More

  • Family Relationships: Sonny Blues by James Baldwin and I Stand Here Ironing by Tillie Olsen

    899 Words  | 2 Pages

    Although, a mother’s determination in the short story “I Stand Here Ironing” mother face with an intense internal conflict involving her oldest daughter Emily. As a single mother struggle, narrator need to work long hours every day in order to support her family. Despite these criticisms, narrator leaves Emily frequently in daycare close to her neighbor, where Emily missing the lack of a family support and loves. According to the neighbor states, “You should smile at Emily more when you look at her” (Olsen 225). On the other hand, neighbor gives the reader a sense that the narrator didn’t show much affection toward Emily as a child. The narrator even comments, “I loved her. There were all the acts of love” (Olsen 225). At the same time, narrator expresses her feeling that she love her daughter. Until, she was not be able to give Emily as much care as she desire and that gives her a sense of guilt, because she ends up remarrying again. Meanwhile narrator having another child named Susan, and life gets more compli...

    Read More

  • A Rose For Emily

    1740 Words  | 4 Pages

    who had lost the person she really knew. This repression of Emily’s father dying was

    Read More

  • The Boat, by Alistair Macleod

    843 Words  | 2 Pages

    The mother is a selfish and stubborn woman. Raised a certain way and never falters from it. She neglects help, oppresses education and persuades people to be what she wants or she will cut them out of her life completely. Her own morals out-weight every other family member’s wants and choices. Her influence and discipline brought every member of the family’s future to serious-danger to care to her wants. She is everything a good mother isn’t and is blind with her own morals. Her stubbornness towards change and education caused the families state of desperation. The realization shown through the story is the family would be better off without a mother to anchor them down.

    Read More

  • William Faulkner's A Rose for Emily : Her Father is to Blame

    672 Words  | 2 Pages

    As time went on pieces from Emily started to drift away and also the home that she confined herself to. The town grew a great deal of sympathy towards Emily, although she never hears it. She was slightly aware of the faint whispers that began when her presence was near. Gossip and whispers may have been the cause of her hideous behavior. The town couldn’t wait to pity Ms. Emily because of the way she looked down on people because she was born with a silver spoon in her mouth and she never thought she would be alone the way her father left her.

    Read More

  • Alienation and Isolation in William Falukners "A Rose For Emily"

    433 Words  | 1 Pages

    Emily’s isolation is evident because after the men that cared about her deserted her, either by death or simply leaving her, she hid from society and didn’t allow anyone to get close to her. Miss Emily is afraid to confront reality. She seems to live in a sort of fantasy world where death has no meaning. Emily refuses to accept or recognize the death of her father, and the fact that the world around her is changing.

    Read More

More about An Analysis of the Mother in Tillie Olsen's Story, "I Stand Here Ironing"

Open Document