A Modest Proposal

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A Modest Proposal Since the beginning of the 19th century, America has had to deal with the on going problem of drugs. We’re surrounded by them everyday, whether we realize it, or not. The evening news is filled with stories of “crack heads” killing each other as well innocent standers- by in a fiendish attempt to find drugs or money to buy drugs. Perhaps you may recall reading the morning paper only to find that another teen has been found dead in an attempt to sale drugs as a way to quick and easy money. Surely every true American as heard a story or two or four about major “drug cartels” paying off police chiefs, judges, and even some members our beloved American government. I think it is agreed by all Americans that this terrible substance must be controlled, and by who else than the great government of the United States of America. Certainly, all those masterminds can find some kind of a way to deal with this ever increasing problem; after all, we are talking about the same government that allows murders, who are defined as “ menaces to society” to sit in penitentiaries for years while they use society’s tax dollars to take care of these individuals. The solution to this drug problem can be solved quite easily by looking in retrospect at the history of this grand nation. Every rule, every law, and the very essence of this country has came about through our humane ability to compromise. When the first Americans did not feel like tending to their land, the government “compromised” with Africans and slavery was born into the United States. In another instance, when white women became a bore to white men a “compromise” was made between white men and black women, and a mulatto was born that was... ... middle of paper ... ..., Blockbuster, all AMC movie theaters, Walgreens, and Eckerds. The latter of which will match all competitive prices of the others. The more popular drugs will be sold as an after dinner condiment at all fine restaurants. On the outset of the acceptance of this idea, one will find that the number of drug related deaths will be at an all time low. Americans will have lower taxes and all the drugs they could ever ask for. There will be no need to sneek around street corners at night to snort cocaine, or to inject heroine. Soon, everyone will be smoking weed instead of raising champagne glasses to ring in the new year. Soon, doctors will be prescribing PCP and angel dust to patients for depression instead of paxil and prozac. Oh, and pregnant women need not worry about their children being barre babies or crack babies, because... we’ll all be crack heads.

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