Aristotle identifies three motivations for friendship: usefulness, pleasure and good. He postulates that when people seek friendship, they look for someone who is worthy of their affection based on one of those three motives. Whether his argument is true is debatable. Many might object to this simplification of such a complex topic. However, his theory holds weight within the context of Book VIII.
Friendships based on two people’s usefulness to each other are considered by Aristotle to be the lowest form of friendship (Aristotle 220). Such friendships are based on each receiving something from the other, whether it is material, such as money, or intangible, such as knowledge. They seek out those who seem good for them (i.e. people who can help further their own goals) (Aristotle 217). Because the friendships are based only on what they each receive from the other, the relationship ends when they are no longer mutually beneficial to one another (Aristotle 219). This type of friendship is readily seen today. For example, two business people partner to create a company together. One provides technical skills needed, while the other offers a large based of networking contacts. They form a friendship, believing that each can help further the growth (a.k.a. profit) of the company. However, should one no longer contribute to the health of the company, the partnership will end. Some might argue that this type of relationship is not a friendship at all, since the affection they hold for each other is in actuality for what that person provides.
The second type of friendship is based on pleasure. Aristotle claims that the “friendship of young people seems to be based on pleasure” (Aristotle 219). These relationships are ephemeral. What i...
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... a relationship to study together. By Aristotle’s definition, they would be in a friendship based on usefulness. However, such people might better be described as acquaintances, unless they have a relationship that goes beyond studying for that class. The same is true for coworkers. Under Aristotle’s definition, the people you work with would be considered your friends, because you maintain a relationship based on your usefulness to one another. However, the relationship between coworkers rarely continues outside of work, and so cannot be considered friendship. Aristotle’s theory of three types of friendship is acceptable as a working definition of what friendship is, but the depth and complexity of emotion contained in friendship goes beyond his definition.
Works Cited
Aristotle. Nicomachean Ethics. Trans. Martin Ostwald. Upper Saddle River: Prentice Hall, 1999.
Friendship can be debated as both a blessing and a curse; as a necessary part of life to be happy or an unnecessary use of time. Friends can be a source of joy and support, they can be a constant stress and something that brings us down, or anywhere in between. In Book 9 of Nicomachean Ethics, Aristotle discusses to great lengths what friendship is and how we should go about these relationships. In the short story “Melvin in the Sixth Grade” by Dana Johnson, we see the main character Avery’s struggle to find herself and also find friendship, as well as Melvin’s rejection of the notion that one must have friends.
Aristotle uses a rather categorical approach to friendship. By making strict delineations and then using examples, he establishes a rather strict definition of friendship that is created along lines of social class. He argues, among other things, that friendship must be between similarly virtuous men of equal standing. In addition, the purest form of friendship, and the one that Aristotle considers the only genuine friendship, involves that of two men and that is free from outside reciprocation.
Acts of a Friend Everyone in life develops at least one friendship in their lifetime, some stronger than others. In some cases a friend might ask for a favor that would be considered immoral. Cicero and Montaigne express their opinions toward this situation and how a true friend would act through the story of Blossius and Tiberius Gracchus. Both come to the same conclusion but they have different reasons as to why they hold that position.
Late one evening, curled up in her nest, Harriet lay thoughtfully reading the last of Aristotle’s model of friendships: the perfect friendship. Though no secret to Harriet, Aristotle presents the idea that it is the most desirable and genuine of the three forms. The foundation of this friendship is not trivial, but instead the relationship is built on a common good and virtuous nature. As Aristotle explains, “those who love for the sake of utility love for the sake of what is good for themselves, and those who love for the sake of pleasure do so for the sake of what is pleasant to themselves.” Aristotle continues, “Perfect friendship is the friendship of men who are good, and alike in virtue; for those wish well alike to each other qua good, and they are good in themselves.” (concluding sentence or two...)
As previously mentioned, Aristotle has identified three different types of friendships. The first is friendship based on utility. This is a friendship in which both parties become involved with each other for their own personal benefit. An example would be a working relationship with an individual. These are people who do not spend much time together, possibly because they do not like each other, and therefore feel no need to associate with one another unless they are mutually useful. They take pleasure from each other’s company just for their own sake. Aristotle uses the elderly and foreigners as examples of friendships based on utility.
II In Books VIII and IX, Aristotle discusses the role of friendship in the good life.
Aristotle believes that everyone is in need of some type of friend, he states that “for rich people and those who rule and have power, there seems to be the greatest need for friends.”(page. 144, book VIII) Aristotle believes that we as humans benefit greatly from having friends, no matter who we are or what position we are in wealthy or poor. There are three distinct types of friendship that Aristotle directs his beliefs towards. These three types of friendships include: Utility, pleasure, and Goodness or virtuous friendship. Aristotle believes that friendship is something that is extremely important to have and should be held above many things. Friendship Utility is unlike the friendships of pleasure or goodness because as Aristotle puts it is “for the old” he explains that friendship Utility is a friendship that two people may have where they only communicate with one another for self-benefit or to gain something for one’s self. These two people are not likely to live with each other and at times may not even be nice to th...
From a young age, most people have gone through many relationships with other people who were not their family. Thus, we often acknowledge these relationships as friendships. But the word friend is too broad, so people categorize their friends into several types. In her book “Necessary Losses: The Lovers, Illusions, Dependencies and Impossible Expectations That All of Us Have to Give Up in Order to Grow”, Judith Viorst divided friendships into six types. Those are convenience friends, special interest friends, historical friends, crossroad friends, cross-generational friends and close friends.
Marion Winik’s “What Are Friends For?” expresses the characteristics of friendships and their importance in her existence. Winik begins by stating her theory of how some people can’t contribute as much to a friendship with their characteristic traits, while others can fulfill the friendship. She illustrates the eight friendships she has experienced, categorized as Buddies, Relative Friends, Work Friends, Faraway Friends, Former Friends, Friends You Love to Hate, Hero Friends, and New Friends. In like manner, the friendships that I have experienced agree and contradict with Winik’s categorizations.
Philosophers have discuss and debate about friendship and the true meaning to be a friend to others Aristotle have given requirements as well as qualities a friend possession within different types of friendships. He debates that a good man does not need friends but the points he brings up proves that a good man can not live a pleasant life in solitary.
Aristotle argues that friendship is a vital part of life. It serves not only as a means to bond individuals together, but also a necessity in achieving overall happiness. Aristotle comments on the various types of friendships that exist, and the role they each play in society. He explains three overarching types; utility, pleasure, and complete friendship. Yet, with family, friendship is different than it is with companionship. As Aristotle states in his piece, Nicomachean Ethics on friendship in families, “they all seem to depend on paternal friendship” (Aristotle, 1161b18). In The Aeneid, Aeneas and Anchises’ relationship, perfectly embodies this. The father son bond does not distinctly resemble one of the three types, rather it is a friendship in of itself; a paternal friendship.
By saying this he means that companionship is the environment in which friendships comes to be. Lewis believes that friendships are made possible by companionship, but when the friendship comes into play, there is a revolutionary break from the matrix of companionship. Lewis provides a schematic for the formation of friendship proper, but he does not provide characteristics related to the time in life when the best type of bond is formed, the time length of the bond, or the time necessary to form the bond as Aristotle does. Aristotle’s description of Virtue Friendship’s long formation period also has within it a notion that Virtue friendships may have formed from preexisting Use or Pleasure Friendships; similar to Lewis’ idea that companionship is the matrix of friendship.
So if you look at Aristotle’s ideas of what friendship is in the simplest way possible, I agree with him. But if you think about it in a more intricate way, observing every detail, I don’t think friendship can be broken down into three groups. Aristotle has some interesting points regarding each type of friendship, but when it’s viewed collectively, considering the many elements along with it, I don’t think his three categories cover all the potential ideas about friendships.
“The silver friend knows your present and the gold friend knows all of your past dirt and glories. Once in a blue moon there is someone who knows it all, someone who knows and accepts you unconditionally, someone who is there for life.” This is a quote I read once in an article by Jill McCorkle. I wrote it down and posted on my wall. McCorkle’s description of a “gold friend” describes a friendship that I have with a group of girls who mean the world to me.
My personal definition of "friendship" is a feeling or emotion expressed in such a way that another feels wanted and important, a relationship between a person or persons where everyone has some companion to talk to when their in need of one. I would define friends as people whom you can have several types of relations with and feel several emotions for that person. Someone that one might go to in time of need. However, friendships differ between people. For example, the friendship that someone may have between them and their parents would be different than the friendship they might have with someone their age. There are many different friendships that people have. Friendships can exist between best friends, friends, lovers, children, parents, siblings, and many more. All of these differ in some way.